I'd like to think of it as imagination, not gore, as Kenzie tells her stories. They usually start out with some grounding to reality, but degrade to bloody messes. Frequently there's a loss of limb. If we're lucky, there's a happy ending. [My comments are encased.]


She went to the aquarium with Nathan today...then came home to tell this story.

Pepper and Conrad [the blue twin to Chirpie] went to the aquarium today and pet a starfish [refer to 2nd picture above]. Starfish have mouths that face the rocks. You have to pet them with one finger because if you pet them with your whole hand you SQUISH them into the rocks and they get mad and they bite you. Really hard. Starfish have REALLY big teeth that start at their uvula and go way far down [as she touches the ground]. One bit Conrad's arm, all the way up to his elbow. [For clarification, we asked her what is a uvula. She looked said, "it's that thing in the back of your throat that helps you swallow." Duh.]

As I started to blog, she continued the story from earlier. What follows is word-for-word, as best as I could type it as she was telling it. The only thing you're missing is the ever-present hand gestures and body movements.

I asked her, "so, you didn't finish the story about Conrad, Pepper and the starfish. What happened?"

It was way down in the sea and they swam down with their clothes on. And they got wet. And they had some new clothes. And the reached their sleeve way up high, then they reach down and they put their hand way down on a starfish. He was like "what's going on? I'll bite you kids!!"

And they backed away [she demonstrates...slow motion, large steps backing away]. There was a diver behind them. He tapped them on the back [finger tapping in the air], they turned around. They reached their hand out and put their hand on the starfishes hand and it bit their whole hand. He thought it was their food. He loves hand food. Yep.

And then they had to go to the doctor's appointment. I covered my hand on their wrist, put pressure on it. And there was the starfish watching them! On the ground. It was sticking way up, staring at me. He gave me dirty looks because he wanted to bite my hand. I kicked him out the window. Down, down into the sea. And he loved the sea.

I grabbed my diver's stuff, put on the slippers, and I swam down from the house. And Pepper and Conrad said [loudly], "be careful Mommy!!" And I said [hands cupping her mouth], "I'm okay buddy, I'm just going to get the starfish."

And I grabbed the starfish and tossed him into the house. You know what happened? He crashed down from the house and I caught him again. And I gently put him in with Pepper, [with emphasis and pause] gently put him under the covers. I put him in gently because he was hurt. He had fire on his feet. So he had to wear fire slippers. His feet really hurt.

"Poor starfish," I said. I gave him a big hug and kiss. And he reached out. And the next morning his feet felt better. I gently put him down in between the rocks and he said [emphatically], "thank you, thank you so much!! I'm glad I'm home now." And he slept all night long. And the next morning I came and said, "Good morning starfish! Now you can come play in our playground."

And he said "YEAH!" And he jumped in the water and got me all wet! [Smiling and laughing.] And got Pepper and Conrad all wet. And the baby in my tummy got wet too. It splashed in my belly button and got in the baby's mouth and got him all wet. And the baby peed it all out. It was a baby named Pepper and he was very nice.

[Directed to me] Ask me how I got him out of there. [Me: "How?"] The doctors had a sharp knive, but they were being very, very careful. They cut my belly off. [I cringed when she said that!] Mom, it's not Ewh! They just cut it gently because they wanted to get the baby out. And that's why, see, my new baby. This is Conrad's new brother. His name is Pepper. Sometimes I name him Chirpie. The End.